Saturday, January 5, 2019

Transitions

I've been thinking about this for a while now...how we seem to easily transition from one stage of our lives to the next without often noticing.

One day we're changing diapers and driving our kids to school and the next we're trying to figure out when is the best time to start to collect Social Security.

Our  names change. Mom and Dad slowly disappear to be replaced by what our grandchildren christen us. In our case, we're now ChiChi and Papa. How we got those names are stories in themselves.

We mourn the passing of movie and rock stars, but our children and younger co-workers look at us strangely and ask who we're talking about.

We transition from seeing the doctor only when it's an emergency to regular appointments to monitor our medication and nagging physical issues.

I was brought up short just a few weeks ago when in addition to my annual physical, I had a Medicare required health review.

Q: Do you eat enough vegetables?  A: Sometimes

Q: How well do you sleep?  A: Like a baby

Q. Do you exercise often?  A: Next question, please.

Maybe we more easily handle the transitions in our lives, because the older we get, the more experienced we are in dealing with change. Over the years, we all cope with our share of disappointments and heartaches. Maybe it's a job that turns out to be not what we expected. Or the sickness of a parent or child.

We learn with each incident how to manage the disappointments a little better, as well as appreciate more deeply the joys.

I was heartbroken when my Dad passed away in 2008. We lost my Mother in June and I'm somewhat embarrassed to say that my grief for her did not match what I experienced for my Dad.

But, a lot happened personally and professionally in the decade between their deaths that no doubt prepared me to cope more easily with her passing.

My wife and I are lucky that our very close relationship with our granddaughter keeps us active. We also work in fields where age discrimination is not an issue. In both college teaching and real estate, experience counts. I doubt either one of us will ever completely retire.

But we do have to figure our how to adjust our life plans to the fact that we're not getting any younger.

There's an eight year difference between us and I'm sure my interest in a typical work week will wane before my wife's. One of her goals is to spend three months in Florida beginning when she's 65. My goal for 2026 is a little less grandiose. I'd like to still be above ground and know who I am and where I am.

David Bowie described aging as "an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been."

I wonder who we'll be?