They say it's your birthday

If you told a much younger me that I would celebrate another year of senior citizenship pretty much confined to my home as the country and the world battled a pandemic, I would have questioned the timeline of your crystal ball.

Those kinds of things happened in other centuries. But the 21st? Nah....

But, here I am.  I'm turning 67 and part of an age group that they say has the most to fear from Covid-19.

I've convinced myself that I don't look 67. People who haven't seen me in a while always say that I "never change."

I also don't think I act 67. I seem to have a good rapport with my college age students and the somewhat younger people I work with at our real estate office. Though to be honest, Mari has told me for years that I was "old before my time."

I guess I never really paid much attention to my age as the days and then years piled up. Too busy with family, work, teaching, and politics to notice.

But now I'm struck by the randomness of life -- and how lucky I am -- as Covid's toll has risen. Spring-breakers; middle-agers; the "elderly;" first responders, health care workers, and grocery store employees - no one seems to be exempt from its wrath.

I know everything is part of the Eternal Plan. But this is a real puzzler. I suppose we'll get the answer when...well, you know...

We're fortunate. Cape Cod is not heavily populated this time of year and it's relatively easy to maintain social distancing when leaving the house for groceries or take out. We know some out of the way beaches where we can get a breath of clean, fresh ocean air without running into crowds. My two places of employment have shifted to virtual operations so technology allows me to function, as if I were in the office or on campus.

On the positive side, the current situation has forced me to learn about technologies like Zoom and similar products that I wasn't all that familiar with. I'm also trying to get better at editing videos, as virtual open houses and showings will no doubt be popular, even when we're finally cleared to resume usual activities.

I'm notorious for never quite finishing a book. While I still have a few in limbo, over the last few weeks I've been reaching the end of the last chapter more than usual.

I've even sat still long enough the watch a few movies. I've seen Trolls World Tour twice...

...and I'm ashamed to admit it, but I've even watched a Hallmark move.

As the virus rampages on, I take comfort in the fact that I've been blessed with good health and pretty good genes. My Mom lived to be nearly 91. Her mother was 80. My Dad was 78. The folks who handle our "investments," say that the actuarial tables predict that I should make it to my 90s. I can only hope and pray that, if I do, I'll know where I am; who I am, and be in control of the majority of my important bodily functions.

I know this. As I get older, I have to resist the temptation to be too concerned about when the first shoe and then the proverbial other shoe will drop. And I definitely have to stay away from WebMD. Now more than ever.

I have a lot to live for. Mari and I have much more to accomplish professionally and personally. Our granddaughter just turned 8 and I'm not going to miss seeing her grow up.

So, it's onward through a year that so far we'd like to forget. I'm actually looking forward to turning 68.

It means I survived being 67.

Who will we be?

What will it be like when we're given the all clear to return to our usual lives?

Will we be the same people we were before this began or somehow changed?

For those of us who could work at home, how willing will we be to return to our tightly packed office cubicles now we know that we can do our jobs away from the office?

After seeing how effective working remotely was, how many companies will re-think the way they do business? An exec we know from a company with several hundred employees has told us that the decision has already been made to issue every new hire a laptop and the tools needed to work at home.

Or, will we be so tired of Zoom meetings and conference calls that we'll be happy to get back to the daily grind?

How will those, who have been somehow been personally impacted by the virus or took seriously the advice of medical experts, deal with that co-worker, who will loudly insist that it was "just the flu" and "not that many people died"?

Will we be willing to stand shoulder to shoulder in TSA lines at airports? Might we even be tempted to buy the seat next to us on the plane so no one will sit there?

How comfortable will we be eating at our favorite table at our favorite restaurant just inches away from the people next to us?

How quick will we be to call our primary care provider if that ache or pain; cough or sniffle that a few months ago we would have ignored doesn't go away in a few days?

The virus has brought out the best and worst in us.

Will we continue to care about our neighbors, who we never really knew before, or go back to our own little worlds?

Will we remember to thank the people, who as every day heroes, remained on the job in hospitals, nursing homes, grocery stories, pharmacies and police and fire stations?  Or will we still be mean spirited towards the people checking out our groceries, stocking the shelves at the pharmacy, or bringing our take out to our cars?

Our daughter, who manages a restaurant that has stayed open because of its well established take out business, tells us she can't believe how angry people are when picking up their orders.

Will we continue to support non-profits that provided food to families or churches that scurried to have on line services?

Or, will we still put ourselves first by the hoarding basic necessities like toilet paper, paper towels, cleaning products, bottled water and other items?

The morning after the President suggested we wear masks when going out -- although inexplicably he said he wouldn't  -- I went to several pharmacies and hardware stores looking for some. My quest was greeted with the same answer everywhere: "we were wiped out weeks ago."

So, why was it that in trips to the grocery store or to get take out, I hardly saw a soul wearing one? Whose shelves have they been sitting on "just in case?"  Even now, why don't we see more people wearing them? Especially seniors??

Will we be like a small, but vocal minority of Catholics who have put themselves first by demanding that public Masses be celebrated so they can receive Communion, thereby putting celebrants at risk? (Somehow I don't think that's what Jesus would do.)

With our hair at the length it was in college and it's color now natural, will we decide that there's no need to spend all that money at the barber shop or salon for fancy cuts and dyes? We look just fine.

Will family movie and game nights continue?

Will we still remember to say our prayers or become too busy again?

Who will we be?